Snippets so English.

Scene. 199 steps in Whitby.
Woman; 'Stand there and just try and smile will you? We don't have any photos with you smiling at all. Come on now. Will you just TRY to look happy?'
Long suffering husband; 'Stop making a fuss, woman. People are looking.'

Scene. Country path with ramblers.
Middle aged woman; 'Can you just slow down a bit? My legs aren't as long as yours, you know!'
Her other half; 'Yeah but there's nowt wrong with the size of your mouth though, is there?'

Scene. Mumof4 paying for some clothes and saying she was going to Italy next week.
Shop assistant; 'My grandfather was Italian. I don't remember him much and I have never been but I don't even like pasta!'
Me; 'Riiiiight. Erm... Well then. Erm. I will think of you when I have pasta next week then!'
Shop assistant; 'Yes you remember that miserable old woman who served you in Marks and Spencers who doesn't like pasta!'

As you can see, still coming across bizarreness whereever I am. This is without father in law's broken record of a comment with the kids; 'Don't mess with the best! Because I am the best!' Which he uses when he tries to play fight with them. I usually mutter, 'the best prat' under my breath.

Tonight when we got back from our visit to the Lake District my mother in law's first words were, 'Did you bring my pillows back then?' as the kids had taken two in the car. More important than seeing if we had had a nice time. Obviously.

And despite this house being FULL of furniture from our flat here which we sold 3 years ago. And the in laws making full use of our dining table and chairs, leather sofas, 4 beds and mattresses. 2 TVs, wardrobe and chest of drawers, the only thing mother in law has asked me if I remembered was a well used pizza tray!!??